Recently, I shared about what I do right before a performance and how important it is for me to be in a prayerful mode and do my best to take the ego out of the equation, so that a higher Power can flow through.
It took me a while to understand the difference between “humility” and “putting myself down”, though. Here’s how I finally got it.
In 2010 my wife and I moved to Los Angeles to help establish the music ministry there for Ananda, the spiritual organization we’re a part of. The main part of our “assignment” was to give concerts and share our music with various groups in many different venues.
I’ve always enjoyed performing and sharing music with people, but I was always very uncomfortable when, afterward, people would come up to me and compliment me about my singing. I remember always trying to leave the place as quickly as I could, keeping my eyes to the ground and avoiding eye contact with anyone.
Then one day I had what I believe was a revelation. I realized that people need to express appreciation, and by acting that way I wasn’t allowing them to do so. Basically, I was still thinking about myself!
Also the thought came to me that by not acknowledging people’s compliments and appreciation, I was actually blocking the flow of inspiration that was trying to come through. I thought that perhaps, if I received people’s compliments with gratitude, instead of resisting them, I would make myself even more receptive to the flow.
So, I started inwardly directing to God every compliment I received. This allowed me to graciously receive and acknowledge people’s appreciation.
If I had a particularly deep experience while singing, I even said something like, “Thank you. Yes, that was amazing.” I knew that it wasn’t from me, so I could genuinely say that.
Since I started doing that, I find that there seems to be more and more inspiration coming through when I sing.
As a musician, this is quite a paradigm shift! While I still have the responsibility to prepare adequately before a performance, much of what happens is out of my control, and it often surprises me, because it’s different from what I would have consciously chosen to do.
How do I know that the performance “worked”? It’s people’s response. Often, because of singing a song in a particular, unexpected way, people come up to me and tell me that that’s exactly the kind of inspiration they needed. There’s no way I could have known that!
In that sense, singing is becoming more and more like an adventure. It’s like traveling through unknown lands and discovering new levels of depth and inspiration.
Wishing you all the best on YOUR singing journey!
–Ramesha
